Voldemort made me do it (a.k.a. KITTENS & RAINBOWS)

It seems that almost every Harry Potter reader has a pet Harry Potter theory. An irrational and immovable conviction that a certain wild speculation will turn out to be true based on creative interpretation of the facts or one of the extremely vague hints left by J.K. Rowling. So here is my pet theory.

Part 1, in essence divided
"Harry did the best he could, trying to ignore the stabbing pains in his forehead, which had been bothering him ever since his trip into the forest." / "Harry was rubbing his forehead. 'I wish I knew what this means!' he burst out angrily. 'My scar keeps hurting - it's happened before, but never as often as this.'" - [PS/SS]

In PS/SS something very strange is going on with the pain in Harry's scar. Harry's scar hurts during the start-of-term feast. Then from the start-of-term feast until a week before final exams Harry's scar doesn't hurt; for a period of almost nine months there isn't even the slightest hint of pain from Harry's scar. Harry encounters Quirrellmort in the Forbidden Forest and suddenly Harry's scar starts hurting all the time; for a period of a week there is no end to the pain coming from Harry's scar. So why doesn't Harry's scar hurt like that in the months before his encounter with Quirrellmort? The way Harry's scar behaves in PS/SS doesn't seem very much like the behaviour of a scar which is supposed to hurt whenever Voldemort is nearby or feeling particularly upset about something, it seems more like the behaviour of a scar which until the encounter with Quirrellmort simply did not realise Voldemort was hidden nearby - a scar which is actually aware of what goes on around it. I believe that is because Harry's scar is aware of what goes on around it.

In CoS Dumbledore tells Harry that Voldemort unintentionally transferred some of his own powers to Harry the night he gave Harry his scar. I don't think that is all Voldemort transferred to Harry that night. I think Voldemort in fact transferred a part of his mind to Harry. Harry's scar marks the place where this separated part of Voldemort's mind dug its way into Harry's head. This explains the strange behaviour of Harry's scar in PS/SS. Until the encounter with Quirrellmort the separated part of Voldemort's mind had not realised Voldemort was hidden nearby. This explains the strange connection between Harry and Voldemort. It is the two separate parts of Voldemort's mind that share a strong connection. This explains why Harry's scar always hurts when the connection with Voldemort is active. It is the part of Voldemort's mind underneath Harry's scar that is connected to Voldemort. And this explains why Harry's scar always hurts when Voldmort is nearby. The part of Voldemort's mind inside Harry desperately wants to return to the rest of Voldemort.(1)

In the first part of this essay I will try to show that there is a separated part of Voldemort's mind inside Harry. The best way to do that is to show how this separated part of Voldemort's mind has been trying to influence Harry over the past fifteen years.

Harry's early childhood
The separated part of Voldemort's mind already was trying to influence Harry when Harry was still living with the Dursleys. When Harry was very small the separated part of Voldemort's mind talked to Harry:

"Harry couldn't explain, even to himself, why he didn't just throw Riddle's diary away. The fact was that even though he knew the diary was blank, he kept absentmindedly picking it up and turning the pages, as though it were a story he wanted to finish. And while Harry was sure he had never heard the name T. M. Riddle before, it still seemed to mean something to him, almost as though Riddle was a friend he'd had when he was very small, and had half-forgotten. But this was absurd. He'd never had friends before Hogwarts, Dudley had made sure of that." - [CoS]

It could not have been the anagram that made the name seem familiar, at that point in the story Harry didn't know Riddle's full name was Tom Marvolo Riddle. But it could have been the separated part of Voldemort's mind talking to Harry. That explains how Harry could have had a friend without Dudley knowing about it. That also explains why Harry's friend called himself Tom Riddle. While everyone else ignored Harry the separated part of Voldemort's mind talked to Harry. The separated part of Voldemort's mind became Harry's only childhood friend. And then the separated part of Voldemort's mind just stopped talking to Harry. Perhaps Harry's mind became too powerful, slowly forcing it into a dormant state, or perhaps more likely it made a tactical decision to stop talking to Harry.

Harry's first and second year at Hogwarts
When Harry several years later is accepted into Hogwarts the separated part of Voldemort's mind resurfaces. In Harry's first two years at Hogwarts the separated part of Voldemort's mind tries to get Harry to transfer to Slytherin. Harry's first night at Hogwarts Harry is told by the Sorting Hat that he would do well in Slytherin. That night the separated part of Voldemort's mind talks to Harry in his sleep:

"He was wearing Professor Quirrell's turban, which kept talking to him, telling him he must transfer to Slytherin at once, because it was his destiny. Harry told the turban he didn't want to be in Slytherin; it got heavier and heavier; he tried to pull it off but it tightened painfully - and there was Malfoy, laughing at him as he struggled with it - then Malfoy turned into the hook-nosed teacher, Snape, whose laugh became high and cold - there was a burst of green light and Harry woke, sweating and shaking." - [PS/SS]

In his dream Harry is wearing Professor Quirrell's turban; we later find out that hidden underneath Professor Quirrell's turban was Voldemort. Which suggests that, like Professor Quirrell, there is a part of Voldemort's mind inside Harry. The turban is constantly talking to Harry, telling him he must transfer to Slytherin, and then the weight of the turban starts to suffocate Harry. Which suggests that the part of Voldemort inside Harry was trying to influence Harry in his sleep. Then in Harry's second year the separated part of Voldemort's mind again tries to get Harry to transfer to Slytherin. When Harry is lying on his bed after the duelling club the separated part of Voldemort's mind talks to Harry:

"But I'm in Gryffindor, Harry thought. The Sorting Hat wouldn't have put me in here if I had Slytherin blood... Ah, said a nasty little voice in his brain, but the Sorting Hat wanted to put you in Slytherin, don't you remember?" - [CoS]

We all assume that this little voice Harry hears inside his head was his inner doubt, but this little voice Harry hears inside his head could also have been the separated part of Voldemort's mind talking to Harry for the first time since his early childhood.(2)

Harry's third year at Hogwarts
In Harry's third year the separated part of Voldemort's mind tries to get Harry to kill Sirius. After sneaking of to Hogsmeade Harry finds out that it was because of Sirius' betrayal that his parents are no longer alive. When Harry is lying in bed that night the separated part of Voldemort puts a number of images into Harry's head:

"A hatred such as he had never known before was coursing through Harry like poison. He could see Black laughing at him through the darkness, as though somebody had pasted the picture from the album over his eyes. He watched, as though somebody was playing him a piece of film, Sirius Black blasting Peter Pettigrew (who resembled Neville Longbottom) into a thousand pieces. He could hear (though he had no idea what Black's voice might sound like) a low, excited mutter. 'It has happened, my Lord... the Potters have made me their Secret-Keeper...' And then came another voice, laughing shrilly, the same laugh that Harry heard inside his head whenever the Dementors drew near..." - [PoA]

Twice the images inside Harry's head are described as though someone was deliberately showing him these things. And then Harry can also hear Sirius' voice, even though he has never heard Sirius speak before. The separated part of Voldemort's mind was putting on a little show for Harry. The separated part of Voldemort's mind was using Harry's anger to get him to avenge his parents' deaths. And Harry actually gets a chance to kill Sirius when later that year he comes face to face with Sirius in the Shrieking Shack. Then just as Harry has his wand pointed at Sirius, the separated part of Voldemort's mind talks to Harry:

"Black made a startled movement that almost dislodged Crookshanks; Harry gripped his wand convulsively - Do it now! said a voice in his head - but the footsteps were thundering up the stairs and Harry still hadn't done it." - [PoA]

Again Harry hears a voice inside his head and this time the voice Harry hears inside his head certainly was not his inner doubt. Again the separated part of Voldemort's mind talks to Harry.

Harry's fourth year at Hogwarts
In Harry's fourth year the separated part of Voldemort's mind tries to keep Sirius away from Harry. When Harry's scar hurts at the start of the year, Harry decides to write a letter to Sirius. But when Sirius then replies that he's coming back to Britain, Harry becomes worried about Sirius' safety. That night the separated part of Voldemort's mind talks to Harry in his sleep:

"Early next morning, Harry woke with a plan fully formed in his mind, as though his sleeping brain had been working on it all night. He got up, dressed in the pale dawn light, left the dormitory without waking Ron, and went back down to the deserted common room. Here he took a piece of parchment from the table upon which his Divination homework still lay and wrote the following letter:

Dear Sirius,
I reckon I just imagined my scar hurting, I was half asleep when I wrote to you last time. There's no point coming back, everything's fine here. Don't worry about me, my head feels completely normal.
Harry" - [GoF]

The fact that the idea to write to Sirius arrived fully formed in Harry's mind after his sleeping brain working had been working on it all night is very suspicious. It suggests that the separated part of Voldemort's mind again tried to influence Harry in his sleep. Harry was genuinely concerned for Sirius' safety, the separated part of Voldemort's mind used that concern to get Harry to write to Sirius.

Harry's fifth year at Hogwarts
And then in Harry's fifth year Harry is suddenly behaving not at all like the Harry we have come to know and love. At the same time the separated part of Voldemort's mind talks to Harry more than any of the previous years:

"But if he had remembered... if he had thought about it... what would he have expected? Not this, said a small and truthful voice inside his head." - [OotP] (3)

"He had been so sure his parents were wonderful people that he had never had the slightest difficulty in disbelieving the aspersions Snape cast on his father's character. Hadn't people like Hagrid and Sirius told Harry how wonderful his father had been? (Yeah, well, look what Sirius was like himself, said a nagging voice inside Harry's head... he was as bad, wasn't he?)" - [OotP]

"Harry was listening hard for the slightest sound of movement, but Sirius might be gagged now, or else unconscious... or, said an unbidden voice inside his head, he might already be dead..." - [OotP]

"Nothing happened. The frustrated face looking back out of the mirror was still, definitely, his own... Sirius didn't have his mirror on him when he went through the archway, said a small voice in Harry's head. That's why it's not working... Harry remained quite still for a moment, then hurled the mirror back into the trunk where it shattered." - [OotP]

I don't think it is a coincidence that in a year where Harry is suddenly behaving very differently, Harry is hearing more voices inside his head than ever. Harry shouts at his friends, Harry quickly becomes angry at his friends, Harry at times completely shuts his friends out. In Harry's fifth year the separated part of Voldemort's mind has been trying to alienate Harry from his friends. The separated part of Voldemort's mind has been using Harry's own fears and doubts to make him question the motives and loyalty of his friends.

Summary
Over the last five years the separated part of Voldemort's mind has tried to get Harry to transfer to Slytherin, tried to get Harry to kill someone, and tried to get Harry to distance himself from the people he trusts most. It seems very clear what the separated part of Voldemort's mind has been trying to do, the separated part of Voldemort's mind has been trying to get Harry to follow in its footsteps.

Part 2, not being truly alive
And then there is Voldemort. Voldemort does not understand love. Voldemort himself does not feel love. And when Voldemort experiences the love of others he actually feels physical pain. As demonstrated in PS/SS when Quirrellmort could not touch Harry. And again in OotP when Voldemort could not bear to be inside Harry's body. Voldemort in his quest for everlasting life has lost the most important part of being alive. Without the ability to feel love I don't think Voldemort can be truly alive.

In the second part of this essay I will try to show that Voldemort is not truly alive. For that we have to go back to the end of PS/SS.

Not being truly alive, he cannot be killed
We know that Voldemort was not truly alive at the end of PS/SS because Dumbledore told Harry Voldemort was not truly alive:

"He is still out there somewhere, perhaps looking for another body to share... not being truly alive, he cannot be killed." - [PS/SS]

Dumbledore could have been referring to three things. Dumbledore could have been referring to Voldemort's vapor state. But then it was because he couldn't be killed that Voldemort became a vapor in the first place, not the other way around. Dumbledore could have been referring to Voldemort's state of cursed half-life caused by drinking unicorn blood. Unicorn blood however doesn't seem to keep you permanently from dying. It certainly didn't prevent Professor Quirrell from dying. So perhaps what Dumbledore was referring to were the steps Voldemort had taken long ago to guard himself against death. These steps then have made it impossible to kill Voldemort by making Voldemort no longer truly alive. And these steps have made Voldemort no longer truly alive by making Voldemort lose the most important part of being alive. This would mean Voldemort already was not truly alive the night he showed up in Godric's Hollow, and he still is not truly alive at the end of OotP.

For neither can live while the other survives
This has some interesting consequences, especially if we consider the prophecy which states:

"... for neither can live while the other survives." - [OotP]

Harry seems to think this means one of them will have to kill the other. When he asks Dumbledore if that is what it means Dumbledore simply answers 'yes'. Dumbledore as always is right of course - In part that is what it means, but that is not all it means. Bear with me while I indulge in a bit of sentence deconstruction.

'Neither' meaning 'not one and not the other', this bit of sentence can be broken down into:

AND

Harry cannot live while Voldemort survives.

It's important to note that both statements have to be true. Now the tricky part; the meaning of the word 'while'. In this context 'while' can either mean 'when on the other hand' or 'as long as', giving us the following possible combinations:

A)

AND

Harry cannot live when on the other hand Voldemort survives.

AND

Harry cannot live as long as Voldemort survives.

AND

Harry cannot live as long as Voldemort survives.

AND

Harry cannot live when on the other hand Voldemort survives.

The first combination seems to be nonsensical, it would mean that both Harry and Voldemort cannot live and both Harry and Voldemort survive, all at the same time. Which leaves combinations B, C and D. At least one of them and perhaps even both cannot live 'as long as' the other survives. Since both Harry and Voldemort at present clearly seem to be surviving, this would mean that at least one of them is not truly alive at the moment.(4)

So is the prophecy referring to the fact that Voldemort literally is not truly alive? If it is then it is only when Voldemort kills Harry that he can become truly alive again, and at the same time can be killed again.

Summary
Dumbledore is saying Voldemort cannot be killed until he becomes truly alive. The prophecy is saying Voldemort cannot become truly alive until Harry dies. There can only be one possible outcome: Voldemort will kill Harry.

Part 3, resolution
Harry faces an intense battle with the part of Voldemort inside of him. While the separated part of Voldemort's mind will try to make Harry go down the same path it once followed, Harry will have to try to make the separated part of Voldemort's mind become human again. But no matter who wins this battle, in the end Voldemort will kill Harry.

When Voldemort kills Harry, the separated part of Voldemort's mind will finally be free to return to Voldemort; and it will take with it everything it experienced while it was trapped in Harry's body, including the love Harry experienced for the people around him. At that moment Voldemort will directly experience how much Harry was actually like him: both were orphans, both had a very tough childhood being raised by Muggles, both were half-bloods, they even looked alike when they were young. But unlike Voldemort, Harry never chose to take revenge on the world; showing Voldemort that it's not the situation we are placed in that determines what we are, it's our choices that define what we truly are. And at that moment Voldemort will directly experience the love Harry felt for the people around him. And it is this love that will ultimately make Voldemort truly alive again.

Voldemort cannot feel love or pain. Voldemort's inability to feel love or pain is in fact the fate worse than death Dumbledore mentions. It is worse than death to live without ever experiencing love or pain. It is worse than death to never be truly alive.(5) When Voldemort's mind is reunited he will experience love, and when he does he will become truly alive again. Of course when Voldemort becomes truly alive he can also be killed again. He probably will be killed that very same instant, either by Neville or by Wormtail.

Doesn't this seem like just the devious underhanded kind of thing J.K. Rowling would come up with, making us believe for a moment that Voldemort actually wins?

-Maus

(1) This is what Dumbledore is talking about when he's muttering to himself after the snake attack on Arthur Weasley:

"'Naturally, naturally,' murmured Dumbledore apparently to himself, still observing the stream of smoke without the slightest sign of surprise. 'But in essence divided?' Harry could make neither head nor tail of this question. The smoke serpent, however, split itself instantly into two snakes, both coiling and undulating in the dark air." - [OotP]

Dumbledore is talking about the essence of Voldemort, Voldemort's mind. The snakes represent the separate parts of Voldemort's mind, which share a bond but at the same time have been living completely separate lives for the past fifteen years. One part trapped inside Harry watching him grow up, the other forced to go into exile waiting for his followers to finally come looking for him.

(2) Or possibly the second time the separated part of Voldemort's mind talked to Harry since his early childhood, there is also this incident at the end of PS/SS:

"Quirrell screamed and tried to throw Harry off - the pain in Harry's head was building - he couldn't see - he could only hear Quirrell's terrible shrieks and Voldemort's yells of, 'KILL HIM! KILL HIM!' and other voices, maybe in Harry's own head, crying, 'Harry! Harry!'" - [PS/SS]

One of these voices almost certainly is Dumbledore coming just in time to pull Harry away from Professor Quirrell. The fact that Harry was not sure if the voices were coming from outside his own head suggests that the other voice was coming from inside his head.

(3) Harry then goes on to have an entire conversation with the voice inside his head:

"But if he had remembered... if he had thought about it... what would he have expected?
Not this, said a small and truthful voice inside his head.
Harry screwed up his face and buried it in his hands. He could not lie to himself; if he had known the prefect badge was on its way, he would have expected it to come to him, not Ron. Did this make him as arrogant as Draco Malfoy? Did he think himself superior to everyone else? Did he really believe he was better than Ron?
No, said the small voice defiantly.
Was that true? Harry wondered, anxiously probing his own feelings.
I'm better at Quidditch, said the voice. But I'm not better at anything else.
That was definitely true, Harry thought; he was no better than Ron in lessons. But what about outside lessons? What about those adventures he, Ron and Hermione had had together since starting at Hogwarts, often risking much worse than expulsion?
Well, Ron and Hermione were with me most of the time, said the voice in Harry's head.
Not all the time, though, Harry argued with himself. They didn't fight Quirrell with me. They didn't take on Riddle and the Basilisk. They didn't get rid of all those Dementors the night Sirius escaped. They weren't in that graveyard with me, the night Voldemort returned... And the same feeling of ill-usage that had overwhelmed him on the night he had arrived rose again. I've definitely done more, Harry thought indignantly. I've done more than either of them!
But maybe, said the small voice fairly, maybe Dumbledore doesn't choose prefects because they've got themselves into a load of dangerous situations... maybe he chooses them for other reasons... Ron must have something you don't...
Harry opened his eyes and stared through his fingers at the wardrobe's clawed feet, remembering what. Fred had said: 'No one in their right mind would make Ron a prefect...' Harry gave a small snort of laughter. A second later he felt sickened with himself." - [OotP]

It is not really clear what the separated part of Voldemort's mind is trying to do here. Perhaps it was trying to make Harry envious of Ron's prefect badge, or perhaps it was using reverse psychology to make Harry doubt Dumbledore's faith in him. Whatever it was trying to do, it certainly is not a good sign when you start having entire conversations with the voices inside your head.

(4) Of course this could also mean that at least one of them is figuratively not truly alive. Harry certainly has reason to figuratively not be truly alive. While Voldemort is out there killing the ones he loves and threatening to take over Harry's mind, Harry will never be able to live a normal life. Voldemort however does not seem to have any reason to figuratively not be truly alive. Nothing is stopping him from abandoning this whole world domination/immortality thing, moving to a nice warm tropical island, and making loads of money of a best selling autobiography entitled 'How I became the Dark Lord'. He could certainly use the tan.

(5) Lupin already told Harry this when he told him about the Dementor's kiss in PoA:

"'...they clamp their jaws upon the mouth of the victim and - and suck out his soul' Harry accidentally spat out a bit of his butterbeer. 'What - they kill -?' 'Oh no,' said Lupin. 'Much worse than that. You can exist without your soul, you know, as long as your brain and heart are still working.'" - [PoA]

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